Parents want to help their children to have every opportunity in their life. The problem is, sometimes children aren’t motivated, and this means that they might have a hard time being successful.
There are probably things that you have tried, as a parent, including punishing them, bribing them or other things that end up not working out. How can you make your child feel more motivated?
Why Children are Not Motivated
Most children have a hard time being motivated because they want to do their own thing. They might have a hard time getting school work done or getting chores done because they are trying to do what they like to do.
You aren’t the only person that has a hard time getting your child motivated. Losing motivation can change as a child gets older and more mature and you might find that one day, they are unmotivated and the next they are full of motivation.
Motivation has more to do with the pleasure that things bring them. There are different personalities that react to motivation differently and things with children aren’t just a universal answer.
How to Motivate Children
Some people might think that children that are unmotivated are just lazy. If they aren’t in bed all day, the chances are that the lack of motivation is because they have other things that they are doing that seem more important to them.
Setting Expectations
Children that lack motivation might feel that way because they feel bad about not being able to reach their parents expectations. Sometimes a parent will cause a child to lack motivation because they are always pushing them too hard.
If your child likes to do writing instead of math, support them in their writing so that they will be more motivated in doing their math.
Set a Plan
Help children to set a plan for their life. Show them that things aren’t always easy as a grown-up and show them how things work. Help them to see that there has to be a responsibility to work hard and to do things so that they can supply their futures.
If your child refuses to study, they might do this because they think that studying won’t get them anywhere. Show them that people that drop out of school will have to work harder because they will have jobs that don’t pay them as much.
Show them that there are careers that are fun and exciting and can reach their interests and help them make their skills stronger.
Set Rewards
Even when things are boring, sometimes you can get your child to do them if you reward them. No one always enjoys working hard and being responsible but setting rewards can make this better.
Motivate your children with extrinsic motivation such as external rewards of money or of praise. Assign the chores so that they work with the child’s age and reward them even if the job they do isn’t perfect.
Change the Mindset
It’s sometimes harder to get younger kids to be motivated. You aren’t going to get a 2-year-old to be motivated to clean because they are too young. Make sure that you are paying attention to the age of the children and what you want them to do.
Always give your children a chance to be successful. This means that you need to give them tasks that they can complete right and be rewarded for what they do.
Help Them
Some children are fearful of doing things because they are afraid to fail, or they are afraid of doing things that they might not be able to do. Give them smaller tasks that help them to achieve things in their life.
Help your child to set smaller goals and help them to do things to reach their goals. Be careful not to do the job for them but help them and guide them. Don’t always give them a time limit or act like you are wasting your time by helping them. This can leave them feeling disappointed or thinking they aren’t good enough.
Celebrate the Small Steps
Motivation is important and you need to celebrate the small goals that they reach. Start celebrating even smaller children, in the preschool age. As you do this, you will build them as they go into elementary, middle, and high school. Avoid critical mistakes such as:
- Not letting your child find a solution before helping them.
- Not praising them.
- Refusing to let your child try something new.
Children need to be encouraged and you need to be careful about not criticizing them. Praise your child even if they mess up and tell them that you saw their effort.
Personality Issues
No matter how you motivate some children, sometimes they aren’t able to be motivated. This might just be that you have a different mindset than they do. You can struggle to motivate your child, or you can argue with them, but if your child doesn’t feel the same way about your attitude of things like being clean, keeping the home clean or working hard, no matter how much you punish them or how many rewards you give them, it won’t change how motivated they are.
Final Thoughts
Motivation is one of the best ways that you can get your child to get things done. If there is no motivation in their life, then chances are that you won’t get the results that you want from them. Try to stay patient and show love to your child no matter how motivated they are or how unmotivated they are.